Many people struggle to let go of control, and this causes anxiety, restlessness, and sours relationships. Wake up and see, are you really ever in control? What do you control? Perhaps a tiny part of your
waking state.
You are not in control when you are sleeping or dreaming. You are not in control of the thoughts and emotions coming to you. You may choose to express them or not, but they come to you without your permission. Most of the functions of your body are not under your control. Do you think you are in control of all the events in your life, in the world, or in the universe? That is a joke! When you look at things from this perspective, you realize you don’t have to be afraid of losing control, because you have nothing to lose in the first place.
Whether you realize it or not, it is only when you are truly relaxed that you can let go of your sense of control. Your identification as ‘somebody’ does not let you totally relax, and in fact, limits you.
If you have always been the centre of attention and are suddenly sidelined, you may feel out of place. Similarly, if you have always been sidelined and are suddenly pushed to the centre of the stage, you may experience restlessness. A very busy person who suddenly has nothing to do, or someone idle and lazy, who is suddenly given a lot of responsibilities, may also experience restlessness. If you are accustomed to ordering others around and suddenly have to take orders, or if you usually follow orders and are suddenly made to give orders, you may feel out of place. Feeling out of place can block reason and distort logic.
Whatever the situation, when it is inevitable, accept it. Your acceptance brings calmness to the mind. When the mind is calm, you can act. If you don’t accept the situation and you are so jittery and agitated, whatever action you take in that state of mind, you will regret it. That is why acceptance is essential.
You are so caught up in your comfort zone. That is the cause of your fear, your anxiety, and your bondage. Your comfort zone is your bondage. Sometimes, when you wake up and say, “I am going to get out of this,” it brings that strength back to you. Life beckons us out of our comfort zone, repeatedly. That’s how we grow.
If the situation is avoidable, walk away from it. If you feel that it can expand your abilities, smile through it. Coming out of your comfort zone time and again will expand your ability and your strength; you become stronger. If you can smile in an awkward situation, it will expand your comfort zone. When your comfort zone expands, no one will be able to push your buttons, and you will become so centred and unshakable. Every awkward situation is a test of your wisdom, of how established you are in knowledge!
The author is a humanitarian leader, spiritual teacher and an ambassador of peace. Views expressed in the above piece are personal and solely those of the author. They do not necessarily reflect News18’s views.
