Nearly one week after the World Cup draw, the SEC completed its 2026 football schedule release, which featured 75 percent less fluff than FIFA’s and 100 percent less Wayne Gretzky not pronouncing countries correctly.
There was also no fake peace prize awarded as part of a bribe to drop federal bribery charges, but give the SEC time. With enough effort, they could go bribe for bribe with FIFA.
The conference’s schedule release lacked the drama of the World Cup draw, mostly because all 16 teams have
known their SEC opponents through 2029 since September. The only drama was learning the dates of each game and filling in a few non-conference holes.
For Ole Miss, the schedule in 2026 is as follows:
If you have tired eyes, here’s that information in readable type:
- vs. Louisville (Nashville) – Sept. 5th or 6th (who’s to say)
- vs. Charlotte – Sept. 12th
- vs. LSU – Sept. 19th
- at Florida – Sept. 26th
- at Vanderbilt – Oct. 10th
- vs. Missouri – Oct. 17th
- at Texas – Oct. 24th
- vs. Auburn – October 31st
- vs. Georgia – Nov. 7th
- at Oklahoma – Nov. 14th
- vs. Wofford – Nov. 21st
- vs. Mississippi State – Nov. 28th
In terms of dates, two things jump out. There’s only one bye week (Oct. 3rd), meaning Ole Miss plays Vanderbilt to Mississippi State without a break (8 straight games). And there are no month-long stretches at home, which Ole Miss benefited from twice in 2025.
While travel will be more strenuous in 2026, Ole Miss caught a break in only leaving Oxford once after they get back from Texas on October 24th. The lone road trip is to Norman in November, which will be challenging again, but spending 33 of 35 days at home to close out the regular season is ACCEPTABLE.
As far as opponents, who knows! It’s December 12, 2025, and we have no way of knowing what any roster (opponent’s or Ole Miss’) will look like when the 2026 season starts.
We can make educated guesses, such as Georgia and Texas will probably be fine, and Wofford is likely in trouble. Even with educated guesses, uncertainty abounds as uncertainty tends to do.
With that in mind, let’s look at each game with less of an eye for the matchup and more of an eye for generalities.
vs. Louisville (Nashville) – Sept. 5th or 6th
The first of two trips to Music City, U.S.A. in a 5-week span, which is a reminder to pace yourself if you’re going to both. Marathon, not a sprint, things of that nature.
Whether on the 5th or 6th, the Broadway tourist bar investors fell to their knees and praised the good Lord above for this financial windfall. Except Morgan Wallen, who was busy replenishing his supply of shithead and trying to figure out the chorus to his next single “White is Alright.”
vs. Charlotte – Sept. 12th
If Ole Miss is not 2-0 after this game, friends, there are problems.
vs. LSU – Sept. 19th
Hooooooo boy.
The Lane Kiffin Prayed Up World Tour arrives in Oxford for the first time since bailing on his playoff team after the Egg Bowl. Southern hospitality requires Ole Miss to be gracious hosts, even when welcoming back a child who threw an arsonist’s hissy fit on his way out.
Initial suggestions for proper host behavior:
- Pre-game video of Oxford hot yoga instructors thanking him for helping them recognize when an asshole is in their classes
- Pre-game video of moms in The Grove saying the version* of “bless his heart” that means “what a stupid asshole”
- During the TV timeout between the 1st and 2nd quarter, introduce all the young ladies who got a DM, as a tribute to Kiffin’s benevolence
And so on and so forth.
*By my count, there are three versions of “bless his/her/your heart”
- Sympathy when times are tough (death, illnesses, other misfortunes, etc.)
- The person means well, but they’re not bright and do dumb things
- The person doesn’t mean well, but they’re too oblivious to realize what an asshole they are
at Florida – Sept. 26th
If Ole Miss repeats their painful and idiotic performance in Gainesville from the 2024 season, the good news is it won’t be the end of their playoff chances because it’s September and not November.
at Vanderbilt – Oct. 10th
Will Diego Pavia still be playing quarterback for the Commodores? Maybe? Likely? What say you, Tom Mars?
For Ole Miss fans, the return trip to Nashville will be an opportunity to get back the credit card you left at one of the Broadway tourist bars on September 5th or 6th.
vs. Missouri – Oct. 17th
One of Lane Kiffin’s elite skills at Ole Miss was shit-talking, which I will very much miss. Perhaps his only regret in 2026 about leaving Ole Miss will be not getting to spend a week talking shit about what a dork Eli Drinkwitz is.
at Texas – Oct. 24th
Prayers up to boomer Ole Miss message board posters during this week. On one hand, their beloved Ole Miss Rebels will try to get an SEC win against a blue blood program they don’t like. On the other hand, it’s the Mannings, and DO WE WANT THEM TO BE UPSET?!!?!?!?
Message board threads from this week may include:
- Will Archie wear red and blue or burnt orange?
- I’m wearing red and blue, but I’ll have a burnt orange patch
- If we win, do you think Arch will transfer to OM?
- Prayers for Archie, Olivia, Cooper, and Cooper’s wife
- Golding should’ve broken the NIL bank to get Arch to transfer
- Win or lose, it will be an honor to play against a Manning
vs. Auburn – Oct. 31st
Let’s hope this game ends before midnight because Auburn Jesus is 100 percent showing up on All Saints’ Day.
vs. Georgia – Nov. 7th
Every Ole Miss fans’ Christmas wishlist should be a defensive line that has Kirby’s offense in the same hell they were in throughout the 2024 game. I, for one, would enjoy hearing the lamentations of Georgia once again.
at Oklahoma – Nov. 14th
Back-to-back trips to Norman has huge “requirements of your parole” vibes.
vs. Wofford – Nov. 21st
SoCon Saturday is back!
vs. Mississippi State – Nov. 28th
With the 2025 Bulldogs (5-7) going to the Mayonnaise Bowl, which is so perfect it hurts, Ole Miss could face a program with less than 3 SEC wins in 3 seasons BUT the defending Mayonnaise Bowl champs.
