As usually happens this time of the college football season, strange things happen around All Hallow’s Day.
And I’m not just talking about Hillcrest Ave.
Nor Boston College’s kind of cool spinning merry-go-round huddle ploy.
Nor that Rocky Top pregame light show.
Nor successful tight end to tight end jump pass fake punts.
Nor that the only two still undefeated schools — Utah and UCLA — remain unblemished with first year HCs.
Nor that Lane Whatsisname — getting in touch with his inner Hayden Fry — painted
the visiting locker room in Red Stick (FR) pink. Which didn’t quite adversely affect the Crimson Tide as much as he would have liked.
Nor the epidemic of coordinator firings.
Nor even the elimination of league title games, and the senseless expanded playoff even though neither fans nor the World Wide Leader nor Pop Tarts people wanted it and there’s but minimal increased revenue.
Nor that Greg Schiano is being retained at woeful Rutgers after being frybabied at Wisconsin.
After a weekend when it is so very appropriate, I’m pissed off.
Why appropriate?
Before Michigan coughed it up against Michigan State, some eco groups actually collected urine from tailgaters outside the stadium.
It’s true. As they say, you can look it up.
They called it “The Piss Off.”
Said donations are to be pasteurized, then turned into fertilizer pellets for use at some botanical gardens and arboretum.
Why am I pissed?
Because I had another suck ass weekend of predictioneering.
Victories by the Utes, Tide and Cardinals were offset by Ls from the Canes, Buckeyes and Wildcats.
I could use a little fertilizer my own self.
3-3 for the weekend. 42-28 on the year.
Any vow to do better this weekend would apparently be an empty promise.
Yet let it be said, let it be done.
I’ll do better this weekend.
CoachSpeak of the Week: “We played like three tons of buzzard puke this afternoon.” — Spike Dykes
This week’s winners:
Wabash @ DePauw. In ancient times, before the advent immediate live video of every game everywhere, a couple of dudes saunter into a drinking establishment in downtown Saint Matthews on a Saturday afternoon. They suggest strongly to the barkeep of the joint that he find the satellite coordinates for the Monon Bell Game and tune it in. When said proprietor balks, as the tale is told, they pull back their jackets, revealing heat packed in their belt buckles. Wise man, he complies. Which is kinda sorta the origin story why I weigh in on this Hoosier encounter annually. DePauw’s Tigers have but one defeat to conference champ Wash U. While the Little Giants — that would be Wabash — stand 5-4 and also fell to the Bears. Tigers at home. Tigers ring the bell. DePauw.
Wake Forest @ SMU. As discussed in previous musings, major ACC considerations here. A Mustang W and that U of L/ Wake/ SMU tarantella commences. Then we’ll find out who ends up sitting in the the title game seat to face Miami after Musical Chairs. Wake has been sneaky good all season. Southern Methodist, not so sneaky meh. I’m hoping for some title tilt turmoil. But the Gio Lopez -led Demon Deacons just appear more solid. Enough to win in Big D? Yes, it says here. Turmoil avoided, at least for another week. Wake Forest.
Southern California @ Indiana. Indiana has simply never looked that good this season. Yet, yet, yet, they are but one misstep from 9-0, which would mean 25 Ws in a row. A not to be ignored number. They must be doing something right, even with uneven QB play. Could it be, might it be . . . Coaching? The Trojans were sautéed at Camp Randall, then unmasked the Buckeyes at home. Is this Lincoln Riley edition actually improved? Do they play enough D to prevail in Bloomington. Don’t think so. IU.
Florida @ Kentucky. Both of these early surprises have settled back to the norm. The Gators more so. As in four defeats in their last five games, after starting 4-0 including a dub over then #4 Ole Miss. After being fricasseed by the Crimson Tide, the Wildcats were cruising along. Until they were kerthumped to the gulley at the foot of Rocky Top Saturday, now triaging the bruises from landing in Rock City. Stein rights the ship. Kentucky.
Louisville @ North Carolina. I have an eery feeling about this one. To the chagrin of those ever willing to argue with me over my verbiage, I’ve dubbed this a trap game. Meaning it’s one the fan base — if not the players and coaches — considers a W. The Belichick/ Petrino combo seems to be working somewhat. 5-4 is an improvement. The Cards’ four victories in a row have come at the hands of ACC bottom feeders. I’m worried. I pray I’m wrong. I don’t pick against the Cards. U of L.
— c d kaplan
