Since our son, Will, is about to wrap up his time in Chicago doing the much-acclaimed (parental brag) An Enemy of the People at TimeLine Theatre, he and my wife chipped in on a Father’s Day present of tickets to Monday night’s game at The Rate, a minor violation of our pledge to never put money into Jerry Reinsdorf’s pocket since they got tickets on the resale market, we took the el, and ate lightly.
It was worth the violation of our code because the game between teams vying for the division lead
was all you could hope for, with the White Sox taking the lead, blowing the lead, taking the lead again, blowing it again (Seranthony Domínguez in the ninth, so of course he blew it), and then winning on a two-out walk-off hit by my favorite player, Sam Antonacci.
Heck, the game was so tense, so exciting, that the large crowd of alleged baseball fans didn’t get so bored they started the *%^#@^ wave until the seventh inning.
But you knew all that already from watching TV or reading reports. What you didn’t know was all the in-stadium stuff you don’t get on the tube.
Of course, you miss stuff at the park, too. No head-on view of the plate with a little box for the strike zone so you know whether a batter was dumb to swing; no scintillating commentary, brilliant observations and analyses, and wry yet hilarious humor from the ever-witty and informative John Schriffen; no ads so poorly done you wonder why somebody didn’t tell them to give up; and no quick easy trip to the bathroom.
But what you miss at home or the local watering hole, in addition to the raucous crowd — loud on anything, since there were a lot of Guardians fans on hand for when things went their way — is all the stuff that happens when the broadcast cuts away for those godawful commercials (give us a break, Mr. Ankin, sir, and stick to the law and stay off the tube).
You know the bits — thousands of otherwise sane adults jumping up and down and screaming “Me, me, me, meeeeee” in hopes of getting a cheap T-shirt shot into the crowd; the guy excited to win a contest only to deflate when he learns the prize is a gift certificate to a casino, because he knows he’ll blow that in 10 minutes; and the camera shots into the crowd of people who would, never, ever dance like that in public if they hadn’t had four beers and maybe a tequila shot or two.
But that wasn’t all the between-inning excitement Monday night. No, sirree. Because Monday was Toy Story 5 night, a promotion tied to the opening of the movie over the weekend.
For one thing, there were ticket packages that included a special commemorative jersey.
Despite the fact that package sold out, I never saw anyone wearing one of the jerseys. Will says he saw just one. The explanation for that may have come the next morning, when my wife checked and found a bunch already for sale on eBay.
But there was more! Yes! And the more was an interesting sociological study.
In one break, they held up big pictures of Toy Story related matters and asked the crowd to vote.
First, it was Woody or Buzz. By noise, Buzz won in a landslide — Will figures 80-20.
Then it was “to infinity and beyond” vs. “you’ve got a friend in me.” Lyric or not, friendship got walloped, which is understandable since Buzz’s quote has become part of our language.
Third, it was Jessie against Bo Peep. Jessie won easily, no surprise since Bo Peep began life losing her sheep and not being able to tell where to find them, which is pretty shoddy performance for a shepherdess.
Finally, though, came the big one — traditional toy versus technology, tech represented by a tablet. The noise levels were about equal, but Will pointed out that most of the noise on the technology side was boos. Chalk a big one up for old-time fun.
Now, kids glued to screens and missing out on life and fun is the key plot line of Toy Story 5, but while there were some kids in attendance, the ballgame crowd was overwhelmingly adults who were there without children, and it’s highly unlikely many, if any, had rushed to theaters to catch the opening of the movie. Ergo, they were booing tech, or at least tech for kids, on a general basis, with an animosity usually reserved for the Cubs or Yankees.
Of course, most were booing while glued to their phones, so it wasn’t a total win for the good old days.
IN SUMMATION
While not wanting to encourage anyone to put money in Reinsdorf’s pocket, it is not only right to point out that getting to pay 10 times as much for a beer as you would have for a cold one at home isn’t the only advantage of going the ballpark. You also get a sociology lesson. At least on Toy Story 5 night.
