Due to the schedule and now off time for the Penguins, we’re bumping back the normal Sunday Standings a day to fit in better. Today’s theme is in the mold of the old late night talk show trope about mean
tweets. We’re not tweeting these but just imagine like a coach or captain of these teams are coming up and deadpan reading these pithy observations about some of the more uncomfortable truths around them.
New Jersey: “Your best player can’t complete simple life tasks without injuring himself”. Usually Jack Hughes has missed time due to shoulder injuries, getting hurt at a steakhouse during a team dinner is a new one for him, and just about everyone else that’s entered a restaurant. The star forward suffered a “freak accident” and had to get his finger operated on. He’ll be out for eight weeks. Terrible thing to happen, I guess on the bright side better for an accident to happen in November than March, if it has to happen at all. The good news is the team is 1-0 since then, hopefully this will end up a painful but minor footnote.
Carolina: “You’re only good at the parts no one remembers”. The Hurricanes are off to another great start, comfortably setting sail for a surefire playoff berth by the end of the season. They’re a sure thing this time of year, and as much as consistency is an impressive feat on its own, no one is rightfully going to take note of them for a while. This is the boring part where you already know what is going to happen for the next few months – Carolina will win more than they lose and keep chugging along just fine. Yawn.
Pittsburgh: “The old guys are covering up a disaster”. The Penguins have 36 5v5 goals, ranking 20th at 2.17 in goals/60. Sidney Crosby (11 5v5 points) and Evgeni Malkin (10) have factored into 58% of the even strength offense. In Crosby’s case, it’s easy to see that continuing indefinitely since point generation is what Crosby has done for 20 years. For Malkin, what happens when Anthony Mantha (who only has two goals in the seven games this month and one at even strength) slows down and lesser players like Tommy Novak and Kevin Hayes can’t score on Malkin’s setups? Beyond casting an eye at goalie performance continuing, how long the Pens can count on some of the oldest players in the league propping up an imperfect team is something to track. And, hey, so far so good.
NY Islanders: “Um…Sorokin isn’t going to win the Vezina”. Out of all the teams in the division right now, it might be the hardest to rain on the Islanders’ parade. They’re doing better than expected, Matthew Schaefer is leading all NHL defensemen with seven goals, the team’s offense is up, Emil Heineman already has nine goals, and within the last 8-10 days NYI has defeated the Rangers, Devils, Vegas and Utah, all in road games. Not too much to snipe at, besides the fact the Islanders are fairly lax defensively and Ilya Sorokin has a sub .900 save percentage to start the season. They’re probably not too worried given the talent level there, but we gotta reach for something.
NY Rangers: “You don’t like your fans, and the feeling is mutual”. The Rangers are 1-7-1 at home, getting shutout in five of the first nine home games. It’s only mid-November and already more members of the division have a shutout win at MSG against the Rangers (WSH, PIT, CAR, NYI) than don’t have a shutout win at MSG against the Rangers (NJ, CBJ, PHI). That might only because the latter three games haven’t gotten the opportunity to PLAY a game in New York yet this season. That’s almost inconceivably bad! It took four games for the Rangers to score even a single goal in front of the home crowd. Naturally, the Rangers are fabulous (9-1-1 ) on the road this year to make up for it, but the turmoil for NYR is still going strong. Certainly one of the more strange ongoing situations in hockey this year.
Philadelphia: “You’re shootout merchants and frauds”. No one in the NHL has less regulation wins than the Flyers (4). For now a 4-0 shootout record is keeping Philadelphia afloat, and there is something to be said about excelling in the task of the shootout. It counts and helps the record. It could be said that simply surviving the 60 minutes and getting the game to overtime is a talent in and of itself (which the Flyers have done in nearly 50% of their games this season, playing 8/18 past 60 minutes). It’s not a very admirable talent, however and perhaps one that can’t be counted on for the long haul. The Flyers haven’t built a very strong base in the first quarter of the season to think they’ll be going very far.
Columbus: “You’re the definition of mid”. Columbus has 56 goals for to 57 goals against. They’re winners in half of their 18 total games. Even splits of 4-3-1 at home, 5-4-1 away. The Blue Jackets are just kinda there so far this season. They have three wins and five total OT games so far this season to help out in the standings, which has enabled them to hang around and track for a decent amount of points, but CBJ needs to pick things up a bit considering that some of the other teams in the division like Pittsburgh and NYI are performing better.
Washington: “Your special teams are offensively bad”. The Caps have the 30th ranked power play (14.6%) and the 27th ranked penalty kill (72.9%). It’s been a real problem and one that could cost them, considering Washington is actually one of the best 5v5 teams in the league. Maybe the issues around assistant coach Mitch Love (suspended and then dismissed) weren’t helping but whatever it is, the Caps need a turnaround big time. Last year’s power play wasn’t that good (14th) but was at least serviceable. Their PK in 2024-25 was 5th in the NHL and it’s been a huge drop off.
