“Thereby was wrought the Hydra, many-necked, flickering its dread tongues. Of its fearful heads some severed lay on earth, but many more were budding from its necks…”
– Quintus Smyrnaeus, The Fall of Troy (4th Century A.D.)
It’s not often that a basketball game makes me think of (or reference) a mythical creature.
I had to double-check, because after 8 years of writing here my articles have run the gamut as far as subject matter is concerned, but I have somehow managed in all that time to avoid referencing
a single primordial cryptid, folkloric being, or otherwise fantastical beasties.
It’s honestly a bit of a shock. Perhaps even an accomplishment at this point, having regaled (and annoyed) so many with the outlines of various historical battles, obscure pop culture references, philosophical and grammatical meanderings, geopolitical analysis, astronomical phenomena, the minutiae of antiquated technologies (and one very odd article about bugs bouncing off of windshields) to find that I’ve yet to have used up my quota for mythological entities.
Not as much of a shock, though, to have spent an evening watching what the Spurs have mutated into over the course of a season, in the face of stiff competition.
The Detroit Pistons are a very good team. To leave it at that feels like a gross understatement. While I didn’t write the preview for that game, I feel duty-bound to point out that not only are the Pistons leading the Eastern Conference, but they have both a higher Net Rating and Defensive Rating than the Spurs do.
Against this version of the Spurs, it just did not matter. At all.
The Spurs were inconsistent on defense in the 2nd and 3rd quarters? Didn’t matter.
Stephon Castle lived inside of Cade Cunningham’s jersey like a toothpick fish inside a urethra. Wemby seemed to block players by just looking in their direction. Devin Vassell floated from defensive rotation to defensive rotation and engulfed his match-ups like the smoke from a dockworker’s Marlboro Red.
The Pistons tried to shut down San Antonio’s outside shooting, keying on Champanige, and Vassell, and even the slumping (25% from three over the last ten games) Keldon Johnson? Didn’t matter.
De’Aaron Fox and Wemby took the opportunity to detonate from inside (and just about everywhere else), and Champagnie and Vassell broke loose in the 4th quarter anyway while Castle flung passes from corner-to-corner with the precision of a professional darts player who just chugged a pint of Ritalin.
It wasn’t even that the Pistons were playing badly. They just couldn’t keep up with the heads of the Grecian monster before them. They even tried to muck things up a bit in 3rd quarter, testing whether the Spurs would cave to their particular brand of physicality. It did not matter.
For every head that the Pistons lopped off, another two grew back. If you were a Pistons fan, it was demoralizing. If you were a Spurs fan, it was mesmerizing.
At the 3/4 mark of the season, these young Spurs are starting to intuitively adapt to in-game adversity. Maybe it’s because they spent so much of the first half of the season having to operate at less than full strength. Maybe each starter (and some of the bench players) having to carry the load at one point or another has transformed them into a largely unsolvable conundrum, each head as deadly and regenerative as the next.
Maybe San Antonio’s front office, not unlike the Greek Goddess Hera, has finally created the perfect foil for the would-be demigods just north of the Red River.
Maybe. I’m still not sure. The postseason is a whole other organism. But there can be no question that the Spurs have reached a whole new level of play over the last five weeks, and barring a few bumps here and there, there are just not many teams that can take on the swarming behemoth of heads, and arms, and legs.
Chances are, there’s at least one Herculean opponent out there to test this silver and black monstrosity.
I am beginning to wonder, though. The Warriors and Suns were able to trouble the Spurs earlier in the season, but that was different version of this team, and they haven’t had as much trouble with them since.
The Pistons actually took down the Thunder themselves just a week ago, but the Spurs are starting to look like a rough match-up for them due to the defensive abilities of San Antonio’s guard rotation. The Thunder are 4-1 against the Spurs, and several of those games featured the Thunder at full strength (and the Spurs, not so much).
The Rockets are still quietly lurking, but they haven’t looked the same since they lost Steven Adams for the season. The Nuggets seen unable to reach a place of full strength/health, and while the Knicks have been a bad match-up for the Spurs, they’re still the Knicks until further notice.
That really just leaves the Cavaliers (who dusted San Antonio twice during a wave of injuries), the Timberwolves, and the no-longer-Tatum-less Boston Celtics. Only one of those teams will be contending in the West.
Dimly, in the distance, a path begins to take shape. It’s going to take some luck (as it always does), but I’m starting to see an aisle carving its way through the postseason clutter.
One thing that’s often forgotten about the tale of the Hydra, is that it reigned uncontested until the arrival of Hercules. There simply wasn’t anyone else capable of contending with the creature. The toxicity of its breath was enough to take out most of the opposition.
Imagine the mighty Herc had gone down with an untimely injury. That might have changed everything.
Takeaways
- I’d like to revisit Stephon Castle for a minute, because, good lord, that man has been putting in work on the defensive end! Castle’s been fantastic on that end all year, but he seems to take it up a notch against the best teams and ball-handlers. Fun fact: Cade Cunningham has gone 15-52 shooting against the Spurs this season. Even more fun fact: The Spurs are now 7-1 against the top other 3 teams in the NBA (by record). Those things are not unrelated. While Wemby is responsible for the black hole that the post is for most teams facing the Spurs, Castle has consistently shown the ability to flat-out erase perimeter superstars at a level I haven’t seen since the-nephew-who-must-not-be-named. It’s absolutely nuts that I don’t feel like the comparison is a bridge too far, but I can’t deny what my eyes are seeing. The number of picks that teams set against Castle whenever he’s on the court is noticeable, and still they’re having to pry the dude off with a crowbar. Cunningham looked frustrated and demoralized by middle of the fourth. And exhausted. I’ve been referring to getting locked down by Castle as being ‘put in the dungeon’ for a few weeks now, but I’m thinking about upgrading it to ‘the pit of despair’, and I honestly think there are more than a few NBA guards who would agree. If Castle doesn’t make 1st team All-Defense, I say we burn the whole thing down!
- I’m starting to get a little worried about Keldon Johnson. Sure, his scoring wasn’t as needed on a night when Wemby and Fox both went off at the same time, but he got a little banged up over the last month, and his shooting has fallen off of a cliff. He’s shooting 45% from the field over the last 10 games, and True Shooting and Effective Field Goal percentages have both dropped by 50+ points after spending most of the season flirting with Kevin Durant levels of efficiency. Hopefully it’s just the result of him pacing himself after inuring his left shoulder, but it’s certainly something to keep an eye. Thankfully this hydra has many heads, but they’ll still need someone to bring the scoring (and energy) off the bench, and Keldon’s been vital in that way all year.
- Luke Kornet only got 8 minutes last night on account of Wemby going thermonuclear, and not a peep was (or will be) heard about it, because that dude is clearly all about the team. Even when he’s not playing, he’s clearly engaged on the sidelines, encouraging his teammates and applauding like he’s an end of the bench big man. I don’t know if this team’s going to really get a shot at the title this season, but if they do, a big part of it will have been the mentality that Kornet and others contribute to. My head still isn’t sure, but my heart says that the vibes are immaculate, and that’s not nothing.
- It should be noted that the Spurs took down the Pistons minus one head of the hydra in Harrison Barnes. I know there are those who have mixed feelings about the dude (and the immensely relatable middle-aged hilarity of injuring oneself in one’s sleep probably doesn’t help), but if there’s one thing the talking heads have been right about when it comes to the Spurs, it’s that they’re on the smaller side, and it’s noticeable without Barnes. I have a feeling he’s going to be incredibly critical when it comes to postseason match-ups, so I hope that hydra head regenerated quickly. Especially since the Spurs face the Celtics (and possibly Jayson Tatum) on Tuesday, and Tatum is a perfect player to exploit that weakness at Power Forward. Still, how good are the Spurs that they didn’t even need him against the #1 team in the East?!
Playing You Out – The Theme Song of the Evening:
Hydra by Toto









