After the Spurs lost the NBA Finals to Mariska Hargitay, Timothée Chalamet, and Anne Hathaway, my spiritual sports non-corporeal self went on a mental vacation, like Tom Hanks in Castaway. I filled my brain with movies directed by Michael Bay. It wasn’t the healthiest thing to do, wouldn’t you say?
But when the unchecked optimism of Opening Night went astray some time during the second quarter, a little humble pie might be exactly what I needed. Or just pie. I skipped dinner. But the Spurs. Our beloved
Spurs. They just needed to shoot better. It’ll be fine (more on that later). It’s all good.
Stephon Castle led the team with 24 points, along with 7 rebounds while Dylan Harper contributed 18 points, 7 rebounds, and 5 assists. Victor Wembanyama had a night to forget field goal percentage wise, but he continued his dominance on the defensive side.
There’s an old baseball adage that the first pitch of the season foreshadows how the entire season will unfold. I like to think the same applies to basketball. So in the highlight below, we have the Spurs offense set up in the half court, flowing through Victor Wembanyama, who then finds Devin Vassell wide friggin’ open for the corner three.
That’s it. That’s the season. Spurs shoot 100% from three the rest of the 81 games left and steamroll into the playoffs like this score says, winning in the scoreboard, and keeping their opponents to ZERO POINTS. Elite defense. So if you didn’t read the headline to this article, and you haven’t watched the game, you can stop reading. That’s all folks!
OK, I guess we’re all too smart to fall for the ol’ jump to conclusion (RIP Richard Riehle) without any prior evidence. Sure, the Spurs may have lost this game, but that does not mean we cannot enjoy some highlights amidst the dumpster fire that was the first half of this game, with the exception of this beautiful full-court pass from Dylan Harper to a streaking Stephon Castle.
I watched this entire game with the same energy as that couple calmly sitting outside a Paris cafe while the city behind them was aflame with social unrest. This is fine. It’s all fine.
Dylan Harper literally and metaphorically and poetically, AND metaphysically weaved his way through a field of arms and legs before he found a cutting Luke Kornet for the open jam. Harper picked up where he left off last postseason but is now running with the starters. The three-guard lineup may need some subtle adjustments or we may see Wembanyama running point, Devin Vassell posting up as center, Stephon Castle taking up power forward, and De’Aaron Fox slotting into small forward because what is positional basketball but a social construct.
Speaking of glorious mustaches, we can stop referring to Keldon Johnson as “The Mustang” but rather as “The Mustache” in honor of his new look. Did you know his middle name is “Wilder.” It’s like his parents knew they would have a son who plays basketball with complete reckless abandon, so much so that his celebratory punch sent a 7-foot, 1-inch Luke Kornet tumbling to the floor in the wake of his excitement.
I love Victor Wembanyama. You love Victor Wembanyama. We all love Victor Wembanyama. Let’s take a step back, ignore that our dude went 1-13 from the field, and instead just bask in the glory that he’ll return to sender any ball in his stratosphere, especially if that ball came off the fingertips of that special someone whose name rhymes with Dolph Lundgren.
Seriously, I think (North) Americans liked Dolph Lundgren in Rocky IV more than Wembanyama likes Chet Holmgren. Even the Soviets won a round in that movie, so let’s chalk up tonight as a win for the Oklahoma City Soviets. No, I am not comparing the Oklahoma City Thunder to a one-party Eurasian state dominated by the Communist Party from 1922 to 1991. What I am saying is that the Supersonics should have never left Seattle.
What a pretty pirouette. Just a ravishing rebound. With a picturesque put-back. And such a handsome hustle of a play.
Is my brain still rattled from the fog of an NBA Finals loss followed by a disappointing loss on Opening Night? Nah, I just appreciate alliteration. Can’t a man have hobbies?
Thankfully, the second half Spurs stuffed the first half Spurs into the lockers and came out blazing to get the game more competitive. Also, don’t stuff people into lockers. Hide behind a keyboard like any modern day bully does.
Now is a good time as any to remind everyone that the Thunder are a very good team. Jalen Williams appears to be fully healthy this year, and they have a sniper in Jared McCain coming off the bench. Still a deep, talented team that remains a top title contender. So this second half push by the Spurs was impressive in of itself.
What? A sprinkle of optimism in the first game out of 82? How dare we.
De’Aaron Fox went a little craft beer with this hoppy and bouncy move to the basket, which was so sweet that it would make a bearded hipster blush through his beard and red flannel shirt.
For you, the day Victor Wembanyama went 1-13 from the field was the most important day of your life. But for him, it was Tuesday. Literally. That new Street Fighter movie doesn’t look half bad either.
If you missed the game because you were too busy looking for the old Street Fighter music video starring MC Hammer, Deion Sanders (yeah, I’m not kidding at all), and Jean-Claude Van Damme, here are the full-game highlights:
Aaand here is that aforementioned music video:
Next up, the Spurs take on the Houston Rockets at the Frost Bank Center on Friday, October 23, 2026 .
