Against an opposing pitcher who’s been one of the best in the AL the last several years, you need your starter to be really sharp — Taj Bradley was doing kinda OK until he wasn’t — and you need your hitters to take advantage of opportunities when they arise. These TWINS were terrible at the latter last year, and are running out mostly the same lineup now. What else would you expect to happen?
Inning-by-inning notes:
1: If you missed the intro, Drew Rasmussen is a darn good pitcher. That sinker/4-seam/cutter
mix means three pitches in the 90s that can go in or out and they’re all thrown hard. Byron Buxton strikes out and two other guys hit nubbers. The onus is gonna be on Taj Bradley to throw a heckuva game.
Aren’t too many ballparks where a ball hit 450 feet ain’t a home run. Maybe the old Polo Grounds? (Looks it up.) Yep, the centerfield wall was 483 feet from home plate. This ain’t the Polo Grounds, though. Nice swat, Junior Caminero. Rays 1-0
2: Groundout, flyout, groundout. Drew Rasmussen’s career BAbip is .262. Normally, when a pitcher’s BAbip is much lower than around .300, that’s taken as an indicator that they’re getting lucky and are likely to come down to Earth sooner or later. So was Mariano Rivera’s .265 BAbip a fluke? It certainly wasn’t.
Three outs on nine pitches is much better than 450-foot dongs.
3: Well, that’s one way to get on base; Matt Wallner walks. (Rasmussen doesn’t walk a lot of guys, either.) Followed by K, ꓘ, groundout. Sigh.
Unlucky start; Nick Fortes squeezes one right down the left-field line and it gets by 3B Royce Lewis for a double. Then the Rays do something I can’t remember the Twins doing in years; they have the #9 hitter lay down a perfect sac bunt to move the runner to third. A grounder on a contact play gets Fortes in.
Radio actually has an interesting factoid; that RBI grounder was by Chandler Simpson, who has never hit a home run over the fence; he had three inside-the-park home runs in the minors. He hit one off Twins pitcher Dan Altavilla in Spring Training this year, but I guess that doesn’t count. Devil Rays 2-0
4: Hey now — a single by Trevor Larnach and a first pitch double by Austin Martin puts two guys in scoring position. Victor Caratini strikes out and I have a terrible feeling about this. Kody Clemens strikes out and Royce Lewis bloops one into “no-man’s land” that Ben Williamson, who is a human man, catches.
It’s innings like this that make me physically angry with the Twins. Like my tummy hurts. I hope the team hotel has bedbugs. OK, not that. But I’m still angry.
Jonathan Aranda hits another dinger off Bradley, the second long ball Bradley’s given up this year. Notably, both homers were on balls outside of the strike zone.
Also not in the strike zone were the four straight balls Bradley threw to Cedric Mullins (after a single by Jonny DeLuca), so this inning/game are within range of getting out of hand. Smart running by DeLuca; he tags and reaches third on a foul flyout just beyond first base. Fortunately Bradley induces the groundout; still, 3-0 seems like more than these Twins can manage tonight.
5: FINALLY! Brooks Lee has a nice AB and it ends with a bang. He fouled off or took several close pitches after falling behind 0-2. The Pride of Missouri City, TX, Tristan Gray, singles. Nothing comes of it.
A seven-pitch inning for Taj. He really is pitching pretty well (minus that walk last inning); too bad the Twins left their good bats in Minnesota. Tampa Bay 3-1
6: Klobberin’ Kody Klemens has a two-out hit. Do you think it matters? Do you think anything the Twins will try to do matters? Now, tomorrow, or ever again? It doesn’t.
Aranda does it again. Same location; off the plate inside. Then Yandy Díaz singles. With two outs, Ben Williamson walks. Royce Lewis saves a double that probably would have scored both runners BUT NOTHING MATTERS DO NOT BOTHER CARING
7: Kris Atteberry mentions that new RP Cole Sulser went to Dartmouth and this fills my heart with hate. Not for Sulser. Brooks Lee has a one-out single. It doesn’t matter. Byron Buxton hits a long fly. Atteberry is excited. I know not to be.
Huh. With one out and the Rays coming around for the fourth time, pitching coach Pete Maki walks out from the dugout and… is ejected. I dunno why. Doesn’t he know that it doesn’t matter?
Caminero hits another homer. So what. That one wasn’t off the plate, by the way, it was dead center. In comes Anthony Banda, a relief pitcher who currently sucks at relief pitching. He is fine. St. Petersburg Devil Rays 6-1
8: Trevor Martin replaces Cole Sulser. It doesn’t matter.
Eric Orze comes in for the team that will lose. He was traded by Tampa to Minnesota this offseason for a pitcher named Jacob Kisting. He currently has a 1.80 ERA in high-A. Good for him.
9: Royce Lewis improves his OPS from .726 to .771 with a dinger. Good for him. Wallner singles and Lee doubles. It doesn’t matter. Bryan Baker in to pitch for the Rays. The shame of Missouri City, TX, Tristan Gray, can’t hit it far enough for the runners to advance and Buxton strikes out on nine pitches and Larnach grounds out I told you it didn’t matter. Twins lose
Studs of the game: Lee and Lewis both having dingers and nice fielding plays. Duds: hoo boy. That last Bradley homer was bad. Caratini, Clemens, Gray and Wallner for failing to do ANYTHING with RISP and less than two outs.
COTG goes to nagurskiinnortheast for cussing at the Twins’ hitters and Zach for sharing a typically wonderful family photo. Thanks to everybody who participated in a GT for a game that was genuinely pretty boring right from the start.
Tomorrow’s game is at 3:10, featuring Shane (not Rue) McClanahan against our own Bailey Ober. Catch y’all next time!













