For anybody who has spent time working within an organisation of a certain size, it’s likely you’ll have come across the Kübler-Ross Change Curve at some point. It tends to rear its head in times of large change within a company as a way of helping people to realise that one day, with a bit of luck, they’ll actually feel ok about being made unemployed.
For anybody who hasn’t heard of Kübler-Ross specifically, the concept is likely something you will be familiar with. Denial. Acceptance. Gan radge.
It’s also closely associated with the stages of grief. The idea that you’re on an emotional journey of sorts where you will, eventually, learn to accept being made redundant and/or the recent passing of a loved one.
Then why, if such frameworks are used to process grief or other life-altering events, is the concept being mentioned on a Sunderland fanzine website? Granit Xhaka, of course. Over to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross…
Stage 1 – Denial
“Why the fuck would he leave after that speech he gave?! Not happening”
This is the point where people go into self-preservation mode. They completely reject the change because accepting it would mean having to deal with it.
When it comes to the rumoured transfer of your club captain to The Worst Club In The World this will often manifest itself in the complete dismissal of the source of the rumour. Unlikely Fabrizio Romano reads Roker Report (although his lawyers might after the last week), but yes I am very much referring to you here, you mollusc.
Stage 2 – Anger
“Look, if he wants to go, fuck him and his agent. Rat.”
Once our minds are opened, even slightly, to the possibility of change then all of the emotion that was previously being ignored needs to go somewhere.
The beauty of football fans is that there really is no limit to where that anger can be directed – Xhaka, his agent, Chelsea, Xabi Alonso, Sunderland’s owners, the Swiss national team manager, Steven Taylor – often all at once. It’s easier to lash out than to show vulnerability.
Stage 3 – Bargaining
“Maybe he’s just after a new deal or reassurances over transfers?!”
Rather than accepting reality for what it is, people start to construct scenarios where the change won’t happen in an attempt to completely rewrite the future.
Football supporters really get to flex their imaginations during this stage and often start talking like armchair Sporting Directors and speak with complete authority on matters such as PSR, club accounts, player wages and how the player has actually just had his downstairs bathroom decorated so he obviously isn’t leaving.
Stage 4 – Depression
“It’s happening, isn’t it? He’s going to be a huge miss”
Despite the overly dramatic title of this stage, it’s actually much more of a quiet resignation that the change is happening. The anger has subsided and everything feels much more reflective.
It’s during this stage that football supporters will often start to refer to the outgoing player in the past tense. He was the driving force; he seemed to love the club, and he had such an impressive jawline despite captaining a country renowned for its chocolate. Fans have already started to say their farewells before anything has actually been confirmed.
Stage 5 – Acceptance
“Ah well, we can’t turn down that kind of money for a 33 year old and I’m sure the recruitment team will replace him”
It’s important to note that this stage isn’t about happiness; it’s simply about accepting that the change is happening and adapting so you’re able to move forward.
Football supporters stop trying to deny or change the outcome (although they all continue to hate Fabrizio Romano) and start to create ways they’re able to live with it. Focus shifts from what’s being lost and starts to look at whether Jay Matete still has time on his contract.
The key thing to keep in mind is that the change curve (or whatever you want to call the journey) isn’t linear. People don’t just quietly progress through the stages like a checklist. A new snippet from a journalist or a frustratingly vague comment from the player himself can send an entire fanbase back and forth along the curve. I personally bounced between calling Xhaka a ponce (Anger) and wanting to wave him off with an engraved fondue set (Acceptance).
The Kübler-Ross Change Curve was designed to help people to navigate significant life events or periods of change over the course of months and years. It sums up the nature of football that supporters navigate that same emotional journey (and back again) over the course of 48 hours. And we wouldn’t have it any other way.
