EXT. HARD ROCK STADIUM, MIAMI — DAY
The Dolphins offense begins their game against the Los Angeles (San Diego) Chargers with the ball. They are prepared to march down the field, ready to conquer all before
them.
On the second play of the drive, Jaylen Waddle deflects a surefire catch into the arms of a defender. Interception.
EXT. HARD ROCK STADIUM, MIAMI — MOMENTS LATER
The Dolphins defense begins the game as the Chargers possess the ball. They are prepared to prevent their opponent from marching down the field, ready to conquer all before them.
They hold Los Angeles to a field goal, that is then turned into a 1st down due to a penalty, miss a chance to recover a fumble, waste a timeout, and surrender a field goal anyway.
WE’RE BACK, BABY.
Defense shows its mettle
Just kidding.
Man.
Imagine.
Coming into this year, the front seven were purported to be not only the strength of Miami’s defense, but one of the best units in the entire NFL. Now, six weeks in, they are not either of those things.
La’Dainian Tomlinson and Austin Ekeler combined for — wait, that was actually Hassan Haskins and Kimani ‘Gore’ Vidal.
Just like Week 5 against the Panthers, the Dolphins’ run defense decided to boost a backup back’s stats into the stratosphere, allowing Vidal to gain 124 yards on 18 carries, good for an average of an embarassing number that they should be ashamed of.
Vidal was the third player from Troy ‘and Abed in the Morning’ University to gain over 100 yards rushing in a game. The Fins make kings of every opponent.
To make matters worse, the Chargers’ offensive line was playing backups at each tackle position, including one Bobby ‘Kevin’ Hart, who hadn’t started a game at tackle since the Napoleonic Wars.
And that’s just the run defense.
The pass defense was also not good, specifically the incredible pass rush, which dominated the Chargers makeshift line to the tune of 1 sack for 1 yard lost. There was some pressure, but it was always a fraction too late. Or, as was the case on the final drive, rushers got to Justin ‘Hoover’ Herbert, but didn’t feel like tackling him.
As soon as the Chargers got the ball back with :43 left, I knew the ending. Not because Herbert is a great come from behind quarterback. Not because the Chargers have a monstrous offense. But because Miami’s defense is one of the worst I’ve ever seen.
The playcalling was iffy, but the operation was solid
Yeah; this is like complimenting the punter.
Plays routinely got in with 10+ seconds left on the play clock, timeouts weren’t burned to save Delay of Game penalties, and pre-snap penalties were kept to a minimum. The 2:00 drill to finish the 1st half was moving along until a penalty on Larry Borom pushed it backwards, ultimately ending with a field goal.
Those are all positives that this team (and all Mike McDaniel led Dolphins teams) typically struggle with.
Great. You guys did it.
On the playcalling front, Charles Davis noted it: the plays all seemed to be narrowed in on De’Von Achane and Jaylen Waddle. When Ollie ‘Commissioner’ Gordon got a carry, it was on a play designed for a shifty back, not a beefy boy.
I have to wonder where Gordon has been. He’s shown he can be a tough interior runner, but Miami is using him sparingly in that role (he did get a chance on the final drive to convert a 3rd and 2, so he’s not completely ignored). It’s hard to say what he shows in practice, but as just an idiot fan, it seems like another misuse of a player by the offensive staff.
The first half game plan varied run and pass along with horizontal and downfield designs, but heading into the second half, the screens kept coming and they didn’t stop coming. Of course, as soon as they did go downfield, Tua threw a pick.
After that, the crowd got themselves into the game by booing and frowning and generally giving the offense the ovation they deserved.
A disastrous 3rd quarter gave way to a better start to the 4th as they drove the field for a touchdown run by Achane.
Then they even engineered a comeback drive that left less than a minute on the clock. That’s what a good team would do.
Alas, finally they remembered the face of their fathers and blew that lead like [removed by auto-moderator].
The offensive line was half decent
That’s the run blocking half, to be precise.
Achane continued to be the lone bright spot on the team, amassing 128 yards on 16 carries and scoring twice on the ground.
While Tua was only sacked twice for 9 yards lost, the o-line still needs to do a better job protecting him (or whoever is behind center).
Looking back at lines of the past, run blocking was always an issue and often a foundational one in terms of holding back the offense. I guess at least that seems to be trending upward a little.
The right side of the line is still made of two backups (Cole ’Doctor’ Strange at RG and Larry Borom at RT respectively), so one would imagine an improvement as soon as the intended players are back in their intended positions. But in the meantime, it’d be nice to see at least some improvement as a group in pass pro.
I know that’s asking a lot of a Dolphins line, but if you don’t ask, the answer is always no.
Rasul Douglas was a great Free Agent pickup
At the start of the year, the secondary was terrifying to consider. It was a smattering of untested youngsters and Minkah Fitzpatrick. General Manager Chris ‘David Alan’ Grier isn’t everyone’s first choice for making personnel decisions (despite the function of his employment), but he nabbed a good one when picked up corner Rasul Douglas in free agency.
Douglas finished the game against LAC with 7 tackles and a QB hit, but was all over the field and doing his level best.
The rest of the back end should take notes. Dante Trader isn’t doing the backfield any favors right now, but he at least has plenty of room to grow. Douglas should be held up as an example for Miami’s defenders and the rest of the roster to follow.
I wish him the best.
Weekly Overreaction: Blow it all up
My dearest Nittany Lions sent head coach James ’Benjamin’ Franklin packing after falling from preseason #2 to out of playoff contention for the low low price of $48 million USD.
Miami can let head coach Mike McDaniel and his staff go for free.
I’m not totally on the ‘fire sale all players’ bandwagon since I think there are some younger guys who show enough potential to hang onto (Achane, Gordon, Ewers, Duck, Chop, and all the latest draft picks), but as far as the coaching staff goes: sometimes the writing is on the wall.
The team is 1-5. They can’t seem to get out of their own way enough to beat bad teams and they insist on snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Much like with PSU and Jimmy Franks: we’ve likely seen the ceiling. For them, it’s not winning a National Championship. For Miami, it’s not winning a playoff game.
If the current setup you have in place can’t reach your aspirations, even if it’s capable of a lot of good (like a CFP semi-final or the 2023 NFL season), there’s really no choice but to try something different.
Yes: it’s entirely possible that the next thing you try is worse and leaves you pining for what you had. It’s also possible that it finally gets you to your goal. At least it’s an unknown.
For Miami, I think it’s time to let MM see how he can fare elsewhere. I hear there’s a sizeable college program with a new opening.
Will the Dolphins defense ever hold a runner under 100 yards again? Will they record more than 2 sacks in a game? Will Grier save most of the cap and replace them all with cardboard cutouts? Tune in next week to As The Dolphins Crumble.
