How much can you age in 3 hours? Apparently a lot. I started the game at 7:30 with a glass of Modelo and by the time 11 rolled around, I was mainlining coffee and cutting Metamucil powder with my debit card to help me stay awake and regular. Being regular is important to your health, even if it’s Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals. Especially if it’s Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals.
Victor Nonga Wembanyama-de Fautereau-Vassel (wait, one of his surnames is Vassel, like one letter away
from Vassell of Devin Vassell?) simply detonated for 41 points and corralled 24 rebounds in double overtime. Dylan Harper, stepping into the starting lineup for an injured De’Aaron Fox, scored 24 points and also grabbed 11 rebounds himself. Stephon Castle flew all over the court and shared the wealth with 11 assists to go with his 17 points.
Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigra? They’re the same face! Doesn’t anybody notice this? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills! I invented the piano key necktie, I invented it!
Victor Wembanyama will grab all the headlines, and deservedly so, but Devin Vassell also showed out on both ends of the floor. We’ve raved about his defense for years, but with Wembanyama anchoring that defense, we got to see Vassell unleashed and unhinged on the perimeter.
Offensively, the box score will say he went 3 – 9 from downtown, but it felt like whenever the Spurs needed a big three-pointer, Vassell came up with one.
Stephon Castle brought a physicality to the game that was much appreciated and frankly had me worried for a bit. It seemed like every time he hit the floor he would get a concussion if his beautiful mane of hair didn’t cushion those spills to the hardwood.
This is a Julian Champagnie appreciation post. Similar to Vassell, Champagnie popped a bubbly buzzer beating three-pointer every time the Spurs needed to counter the Thunder’s jabs and haymakers.
I don’t know how many put backs Wembanyama officially had (I’m sure there’s an official stat out there, but it’s late, and I had too much coffee and Metamucil), but let’s pretend it was as much as the amount of money it takes to fill up a mid-size SUV with today’s gas prices—which is a lot.
Just when you think you’ve seen it all this season (and the last two seasons), the Frenchman uncorks another preposterous play. Did his feet even leave the court? Barely. Did he just casually turn ever so slightly to his left, something Derek Zoolander cannot do, and put the ball over and through two grown men? You bet your Vassel (or Vassell) he did.
Just hang this in the Lourve next to Leonardo da Vinci’s “Vitruvian Man.”
This is what happens when you feed a Gremlin after midnight.
I’m really enjoying these amazing photos of Wembanyama. Although it feels like from these vantage points, someone as tall as or even taller than Wembanyama is taking these photos. Is Sam Presti trolling everyone? Did he secretly clone Wembanyama, hire the clone as a photographer, then like a sleeper cell activate him as a future draft pick for the Thunder when Adam Silver utters the magic words, “Derelicte” or “Orange Mocha Frappuccino”?
At least once a game, Castle unleashes his patented double-clutch-while-in-midair-to-avoid-a-block-or-deflection dunk.
Absolutely insane behavior from an unhinged individual. Just bonkers. It’s a crazy, stupid, Ryan Gosling shot if he misses it, but it’s still a crazy, stupid Steve Carell shot even especially that he made it. The huevos on this guy! It’s like he played pissed off all night because he thought Shams Charania should have stolen Amazon’s moment by spoiling the Most Valuable Player by tweeting out HIS name.
As the kids say these days, it’s giving Michael Jordan vibes when Karl Malone was named MVP in 1998.
Nevertheless, it’s just Game 1. But what a game won it was.
If you missed the game because you were too busy thwarting a plot against the prime minister of Malaysia, here are the full-game highlights:
Next up, the Spurs remain in Oklahoma City to take on the Thunder in Game 2 on Wednesday, May 20, 2026.
