The Miami Hurricanes have slipped to 5-1 and lost to another unranked team under Mario Cristobal. This time it was the Jeff Brohm led Louisville Cardinals, a program that’s 2-1 against Miami during the Cristobal Era.
‘Canes fans are clearly heartbroken and have been writing in sharing their concerns all weekend.
We’ll attempt to answer three burning questions about The U before their home matchup against the Stanford Cardinal.
1- Mario choked again, do I keep believing in him?
“A tiger can’t change its spots!“ was famously yelled by Ashley Grant at ”Brian Ryan” in the greatest movie ever made, 2000’s Whatever It Takes. I’m sure at some point in life you’ve heard the cliche “fool me once…” and that’s how you need to feel about Cristobal.
Mario has shown his true colors back at Oregon where he lost to unranked teams every season and has continued to be out coached at Miami by Brohm, Brent Key, and even the fired guy at MTSU. Here are a few silver linings to consider:
1- At least we aren’t FSU fans watching our favorite team lose to Stanford, right?? Right?!
2- At least Mario can beat Billy Napier and Mike Norvell most of the time.
2- Why is Mirabal’s favorite song “The Middle?”
2018’s “The Middle” by Grey, Maren Morris, and Zedd was a pop sensation. I’m assuming it’s on Alex Mirabal’s 4am wake-up mix because he surely has run coordinatored the Miami offense into running up the middle. Maybe he only has a three song playlist on repeat that features “Stuck in the Middle With You” by Stealers Wheel and another “The Middle,” this one by Jimmy Eat World.
The ‘Canes are living and dying with the run concept “Duo” which features two combo blocks, the PSDE being blocked by the TE and the backside OT gap-hinging on the backside. Two of the three ‘options’ for the back are in the A-Gap.
“Bang” refers to the RB’s first read, “Bend” is his 2nd read which here is the backside A-Gap, and “Bounce” typically will be freed up on the playside but in the C-Gap. Why the ‘Canes can’t run pin-pull or wide sweep is beyond me.
3- Why does Miami put up four fingers before the 4th quarter?
Ok Timmy, let’s sit down and discuss the ‘Canes of yore. You see in the olden days before SnapChatting your nuts around and vape pens men used to moon people and smoke Camels.
The Miami Hurricanes also used to dominate the 4th quarter and if they had the lead heading into the 4th they surely were going to emerge victorious. But over the last 25 years it’s just another symbol of what used to be.
And much like how the players now celebrate 1st downs with someone else’s touchdown celebration- they’re just riding off of someone else’s success without having earned the credit on their own.
OK, y’all. We’re done talking about Louisville now. Onto the next one!
