Just one day visiting Auburn, Alabama and you quickly realize why it’s called “The Plains”.
It’s because that place is just as plain boring as can be. Any college town with a 4 pm sunset and only 3 bars
is one that I do not want to go to. The pronunciation of Auburn starts with “Aw” for a reason, becuase it’s easy to feel bad for.
“The Plains” is really named for how flat of a town it is. You could line up 10 UGA students and 10 Auburn students and be able to tell with 100% certainty who is who based solely on the definition of their calves. The beautiful rollings hills on the UGA campus certainly make life miserable for any nerdy science major luggin up Ag Hill, but darnit if they don’t know how to tone a leg.
Those competing geographical situations will square off this weekend as our beloved University of Georgia football team will take on the football team from everyone’s favorite backup school, Auburn University.
Even if the Auburn team isn’t looking as good as the ESPN “experts” thought they would this year, you always have to be careful rolling into Jordan Hare. Auburn fans love to throw toilet paper as high as they can not as a celebration, but becuase there is always sh*t in the air at that place. The Jordan Hare voodoo, at night, in an odd year, has some real power.
Oklahoma and Texas A&M have shown the blueprint for stopping the 2025 Auburn offense; getting pressure on QB Jackson Arnold. But while defense has always been a strong-suite of a Kirby-led team, this year’s defense is oddly reminiscent of a male kangaroo: no sacks.
Our lack of pressure has been concerning to say the least and the worst thing of all time to say the most. Knowing the fact that Auburn gave up 9 sacks against Oklahoma, it goes sans saying that the alarm bells will be ringing if Georgia fails to get home on Arnold this weekend.
Kirby typically prefers to sit back and utilize a spy when facing a QB like Arnold, forcing them to beat us through the air and not allowing them to use their legs. But sending the house in obvious passing downs may be more appropriate this time around.
On a night when Auburn finally does what the NCAA should have in 2010 and retired Cam Newton’s jersey for receiving impermissible benefits, Georgia QB Gunner Stockton should look to do his best Newton impersonation utilizing his legs. With the injuries on the O-Line piling up faster than a NASCAR race and the crowd of 80,000 UGA rejectees screaming bloody murder, I don’t expect pass-protection to hold up for long this week.
Georgia fans love to hate on Mike Bobo for his whole-hearted commitment to throwing screen passes, but it may be the best call in passing downs with such a reshuffled line. But unless it’s third and long, I fully agree with the age-old adage of “Run the Damn Ball.” There may not be a star in Georgia’s backfied this year, but there are 4 really solid options with complementary skillsets. So let’s RTDB.
There have been some crazy highs and some crazy lows in this game known as the Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry, but there is no low lower than when this game was moved to early in the season. Georgia-Auburn is a game that deserves to be played late in the year, in fall weather, with fans drinking whiskey in sweaters and their popped polo collars.
Even if we aren’t clinching a spot in the SEC Championship Game or ruining Auburn’s chance at the same, there are still few sweeter things than watching the Dawgs win on The Plains. It’s time for Georgia to get even more revenge for the Nick Unfairly game and dance along those oddly flat streets once more.
Go Dawgs.
