It is natural to be lazy during the holidays. However, the Bayern Munich office is lazy year round, and nothing is more reflective of the same than its proposed plans for the January transfer window.
So far, Uli Hoeneß, Christoph Freund and Max Eberl have all, in past interviews, described Bayern’s injured players as their winter transfers. The newest member to the statement rehash carousel is Jan-Christian Dreesen.
The CEO in a recent interview said that Bayern have already made “several winter transfers”
since several players are returning from injury and will further bolster the squad, per @iMiaSanMia. “All three players, Jamal in particular, will bring new and additional quality. It’s up to the coach how he sets up the team now,” Dreesen declared.
There is so much to say but let’s get to it, one thing at a time.
First off, there is surely a better way to rehash the same statement… right?
When Hoeneß first said in September 2025 that Bayern were to welcome three new transfers in Musiala, Ito and Davies, no one could have imagined how heavily (ab)used this statement would turn. It’s almost as if there is a common Google Doc on the Front Office WhatsApp chat named “excuses to make this week,” with a footer note saying “just change it enough so it doesn’t look copied,” but we all know how that goes.
The front office making lazy excuses isn’t even remotely new — remember Herbert Hainer’s statements in 2020? There was a “COVID ruined our finances” statement every single time someone took a mic up to that man’s face. You could have asked him what he’d eaten for breakfast and he would’ve found a way to make it about COVID.
Secondly, the logic behind this. Bayern acting like they hit the jackpot because they got world-class talent for free is insane. Their financially prudent “transfer window” will mean absolutely nothing the moment another injury crisis hits.
Something is certainly being transferred here — not players, but responsibility, onto the medical team.
Dropping the onus of your team’s success this season onto medical professionals is madness. They are probably bracing for a crisis as we speak, given how overworked most of our team is.
Thirdly, you can simply choose not to give statements if you actually plan on saying nothing. This isn’t an essay whose word limit you’re struggling to meet. The fans may not be overtly angry — but they’re certainly not at ease either. The club fails to understand that everyone watching has already begun seeing the cracks — whether it be in a clearly overworked Michael Olise or a completely out-of-depth Joshua Kimmich.
If the officials are so desperate to say something optimistic, they can start reading out X-Ray findings now on. “This is a plain X-Ray of the left leg in AP view and another one in lateral view showing a fracture of distal fibula with subluxation of talus. Patient is status post ORIF done in July 2025 and latest X-Rays show complete bone union with callus formation. Hardware seen in position, no signs of any complication. Patient is mobilizing well and is cleared to restart sports.”
Well, it’s all fun and games until we sign someone and it’s Leon Goretzka… on a new contract. Happy 2026 to all.
