1. I cannot begin to express how cursed the Baltimore Ravens’ season is right now. After four weeks recovering from a hamstring injury, the Ravens got Lamar Jackson back for exactly one play before he was potentially lost for the season with a freak right thumb injury that will require surgery. Bad luck is just too poor a term for that. This is the reality Bears fans feared when they saw Caleb Williams go down in Week 2—that knowledge that your season is completely cooked. Jackson and this team deserved
better than that.
2. I do hate to agree with the refs on controversial calls, but…the officials got that game-changing false start against the Kansas City Chiefs 100 percent right. For those who don’t fully get the rules: yes, you can look back at the quarterback for a silent count signal to snap the ball, but you cannot make any jerky moves with the rest of your body when you do. In this case, Chiefs right tackle Jaylon Moore clearly rocked backward slightly on that 4th-and-goal attempt before trying to play it off by looking inside, and he got busted. It’s a brutal play given that the Chiefs probably would’ve won if it had gone through, but it was correct.
3. Fans complaining about the Bears “overpaying” for defensive tackle Jeffery Simmons are comical. For one, the cost evens out a bit when you consider the Titans had to pay out Simmons’ bonus, which saves the Bears money. Plus, when you trade for a player who just got extended, especially once as good as Simmons, elevated price is just part of the deal. But for those who had misgivings about it: ask yourself whether the 25th pick (or whatever) in the next two drafts will be better than what Simmons just did for the Bears against the Seattle Seahawks. Because I’m gonna guess not. That guy is a monster.
4. Another Bears Monday Night Football game, another Troy Aikman masterclass of not understanding how the NFL works today. I’m almost sad Aikman won’t get many more Bears games before his ESPN contract is up because I can tell how hard it is for him to watch Ben Johnson repeatedly defy his expectations for how one plays winning football. “Take the points?” That’s exactly what Johnson’s doing, except that he’s taking six points instead of three. Also, can we do better than referring to Williams extending plays as “streetball?” I mean, seriously. You’d think he’s watching an And-1 mixtape out there. Sorry you could never do that in your career, man.
5. I don’t care how bad the Green Bay Packers’ running back position is without Josh Jacobs. I just cannot understand how Green Bay can stick with the guy after new allegations of domestic abuse by other women just became public after he essentially made fun of his previous allegations while scoring a touchdown in his last game. Between Jacobs and the Chiefs signing weirdo Justin Tucker to the practice squad because fellow weirdo Harrison Butker keeps missing too far to the right, let’s never pretend again that the NFL cares about women.
6. I know the weather was awful in Tampa Bay last Sunday. You could see it on the broadcast. But winning a game in which Baker Mayfield completed zero passes—while only attempting three? The most insane game I’d seen before that had been then-Patriots quarterback Mac Jones completing just two of three passes against the Buffalo Bills in 2021 in a snow globe. But this takes the cake. Then again, when your running backs combine for 310 yards on almost six yards a carry, who cares? Honestly, just do that every game at this point. Whatever works.
7. Here’s the thing about trash talk: if you do it, you better stand on business, not get stood on your head. Hopefully, young Jared Verse just learned himself a lesson, especially when it comes to riling up your divisional opponents. If you’re going to talk, you have to put in pain. Zero tackles ain’t gonna cut it. Not to mention Mason McCormick going full WWE on him to add insult to injury. Sometimes, it’s best to just let your play do the talking.
8. The Dallas Cowboys are getting every single thing they deserve after hiring Brian Schottenheimer, and the petty side of me can rest happy knowing that Jerry Jones will never see another Super Bowl as long as he lives because of decisions like that. Because what do you mean you just blew an overtime game to Gardner Minshew and the Arizona Cardinals? (And it shouldn’t even have gone to OT in the first place. Cards kicker Chad Ryland should’ve ended it in regulation.) The Cowboys are in a division with the left-for-dead Eagles, a Commanders team stuck in the mud, and a Giants squad that lost starting quarterback Jaxson Dart early this year and are 3-5. That’s a fireable offense on its own.
9. The Minnesota Vikings might be the most fraudulent division leader I’ve ever seen. And that’s wild to say given what Brian Flores and that defense continue to do to opposing offenses. But right now, if I’m the Chicago Bears, I would have zero fear in my heart about going up against Kyler Murray and the Vikings offense. Especially with the crew you have right now.
10. You know what, Ryan Poles? You might as well send that fifth-rounder you just got from the Titans to the Chargers for Khalil Mack and just turn this into an absolute horror show. This offense, with Caleb Williams running it, is ready. At this point, just make the defense as big a problem as you can, and go get that trophy.
