…but not the good kind.
Good afternoon. There are football games on tonight, and here is a Big Ten power ranking:
Big Ten Teams, Ranked By The Amount Of Time I Have Spent Watching Them In 2025
- Northwestern Wildcats
- UCLA Bruins, somefuckinghow
- Oregon Ducks
- Penn State Nittany Lions
- Minnesota Golden Gophers — I dunno, maybe a quarter while I was at my parents’
- Illinois Fighting Illini
- USC Trojans
- wisconsin badgers — enough of the Miami (Ohio) game that it’s hilarious and not at all surprising
- Ohio State Buckeyes — a few minutes of Texas, a couple plays of Minnesota
- Purdue Boilermakers, Rutgers Scarlet Knights — a few plays from their most recent losses
- Washington Huskies — a couple plays
- (tie) Indiana Hoosiers, Iowa Hawkeyes, Maryland Terrapins, Michigan Wolverines, Michigan State Spartans, Nebraska Cornhuskers — literally not a second
Wednesday, October 8
Missouri State Bears at Middle Tennessee Blue Raiders 6:30pm | ESPN2 | MOSt -2.5 | O/U 51.5
UTEP Miners
7pm | CBSSN | UTEP +2.5 | O/U 47.5
There. That’s 160 words. Talk among yourselves.
