A month ago, we asked our readers to give us a list of head coaches who should be on the hot seat. At the time, you guys told us that the person who should have the hottest tushy was the head coach of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Todd Bowles. In second place was Green Bay Packers
coach Matt LaFleur, and rounding out the list was Los Angeles Chargers head coach Jim Harbaugh.The NFL is a wild place, and a lot can happen in a month. Since our last edition of this series, two of the three coaches who were
previously predicted to be on their way out have found a way to right their ship enough for the time being to at least work their way off this list.
But one coach has not disappointed and has lived up to our expectations of sub-par performance. Heck, some might even say his team has exceeded expectations of just how truly awful they can be. When it comes to sucking, this guy is the gold standard.
Here is what you said.
1. Jim Harbaugh – Los Angeles Chargers
Previous Ranking: 3
Heat Rating: Like every fart he has ever had in his entire life is coming out all at once
Harbaugh (seen in the image above showing one of his players what his pet turtle looks like when it’s trying to eat lettuce) has been hard at work moving up the charts. Jumping from third place to first, Captain Khaki Pants has continued to be haunted by the angry spirits of the San Diego faithful, who are still angry that the team left their lovely city in favor of being Los Angeles’ unwanted stepchild.
The Chargers have lost their last two games by double digits, with their most recent loss coming to their big brothers, the Los Angeles Rams, who held Harbaugh’s team to just nine points. Quarterback Justin Herbert continues to have the worst season of his career — with a season QBR of just 32.5, he’s currently sporting an uninspiring 5/10 interception-to-touchdown ratio.
The Chargers are by far the worst team in the league. The only question is: can Harbaugh buy himself one more year by throwing his coordinators under the bus to save his own skin?
Here is what you had to say:
“Andy Reid /s
But seriously, Dave Toub should be. Not quite sure why he’s still a Chief.
head coaches? Dan Quinn, Jim Harbaugh, Dave Canales”
2. Nick Sirianni- Philadelphia Eagles
Previous Ranking: N/A
Heat Rating: On the toilet after appearing on the YouTube series “Hot Ones.”
Sirianni (seen here looking down at his shoes and trying to remember if he put them on the right feet) is the only coach on this list to have won a Super Bowl.
At first glance, it might seem a little unfair to have Sirianni on this list, especially when you consider he lost his starting quarterback for the season, and his best offensive lineman (Lane Johnson) decided to retire mid-year.
But the Eagles have dropped six in a row, and this isn’t the first time a Sirianni-coached team has folded under pressure. In 2021, the Eagles were 10-1, heading into Week 13, and proceeded to go 1-5 the rest of the way to close out the season, squeaking into the playoffs as a wildcard, where they promptly got bounced by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers 32-9.
Also, it’s a little hard to feel bad for anyone in the Eagles organization this season, when the Eagles’ starting quarterback, Jalen Hurts, had a serious medical emergency due to his diagnosis of blood clots in his lungs being mishandled by the team.
Here is what you had to say:
“Siriani has got to be sitting on a cast iron skillet at the very least”
3. Dan Quinn- Washington Commanders
Previous Ranking: N/A
Heat Rating: Sitting too close to the campfire so that the soles on your shoes start to melt
Since making a surprise appearance in the NFC Championship game in 2024, Dan Quinn (pictured above thinking he just had to toot, but realizing a little bit more came out) and the Commanders have gone 7-16 combined. That’s a .304 winning percentage over the last two seasons.
Some may give Quinn a pass because his franchise quarterback, Jayden Daniels, has been a regular on the injured list. But let’s be real: the NFL is a results-driven industry, and fair or not, the output just hasn’t been there.
Quinn made his name in the NFL as a defensive coordinator with the Seattle Seahawks, so it’s a tough look when the only team you’ve held to under 20 points on the season is the aforementioned Eagles. Especially when three teams have dropped 30+ points on you so far this year.
Here is what you had to say:
“Harbaugh, Schottenheimer, Siriani, and quinn all will be gone”
Guys who should be monitoring the temperature of their cheeks: Shane Steichen (Indianapolis Colts), Dave Canales (Carolina Panthers), and Brian Schottenheimer (Dallas Cowboys)
