Manchester United earned its first win this past Saturday while the dealmakers at the club purchased a new goalkeeper and completed a near jettison of “The Bomb Squad” on the European deadline day.
What happens next is all up to Ruben Amorim and the players he marches out onto the pitch. Thank the maker we have an international break to regroup and take a breather.
The match against Burnley was a much-needed but unconvincing win against a newly promoted side. For all the gaudy offensive stats that
United racked up in the first half, they only had a Burnley own goal to show for it, and they had to overcome two second-half equalizers from the Clarets with a stoppage-time penalty conversion, courtesy of Bruno Fernandes.
Considering United lost to fourth-division Grimsby Town not four days earlier, I guess beggars can’t be choosers. But, man, it would’ve been nice to see United finish their early chances and enjoy a breezy multi-goal win without much jeopardy.
It should also be noted that Matheus Cunha and Mason Mount picked up injuries during the match, which is potentially a massive blow considering their importance to Amorim’s preferred setup. Hopefully, a relaxing international break will be the only time needed for them to recover.
Of course, the European transfer window closed on Monday, and United were busy — mostly with outgoings.
Ahead of Monday, the permanent transfer of Alejandro Garnacho to Chelsea was made official, making him one of the most expensive sales in United’s history. The fee was not what anyone would have expected when they watched Garnacho sit on that advertising board, but he played his role in poisoning the relationship. Now, his lasting impact at Old Trafford might be the significant profit his sale represents when United need to balance their books.
On deadline day, Antony permanently transferred to Real Betis for a hilariously small fee compared to what United were extorted when they brought him to Old Trafford (we will never forget the destruction you wrought, Erik). Rasmus Højlund was loaned to Napoli with an obligation to buy, while Aston Villa took on 80 percent of Sancho’s wages, which means the running out of his United contract this season will be less significantly less expensive.
Additionally, United completed the signing of goalkeeper Senne Lammens from Royal Antwerp, increasing the tally to four first-team goalkeepers. Lammens represents a young but promising goalkeeping prospect, and his arrival could speed up the end of either Andre Onana or Altay Bayindir’s time at the club. The question will be whether that’s ahead of the closing of the Turkish and Saudi Arabian transfer windows later this month, the January window, or next summer.
So, here we go. The distraction of summer transfer business is virtually done, the players who drew the disdain of Amorim are gone — except for poor Tyrell Malacia, who is just stuck in purgatory, I guess? — and United have four new, mostly very expensive signings to fit into the team.
Can this team overcome the loss to Grimsby? Can this team survive the upcoming onslaught of Manchester City and Chelsea in back-to-back weeks, coming out of the international break with a match at Anfield a month later?
We will see. I just hope that Amorim can coach some wins and stop being such an emo baby after every loss. The extreme honesty is, honestly, getting a little tiring, and I would prefer solutions over commiserations. Yeah, thanks for acknowledging that we feel bad, and you also feel bad. However, Ruben, only one of us, is directly responsible for reversing the cause of the bad feelings, you know?
MD3 and End of Summer Transfer Window Vibes Reading
Now, the Manchester United 2025-26 Vibes-O-Meter is a very specific device developed with the most advanced science available to us: our gut.
The Vibes-O-Meter uses a scale of 1-10 based on the contemporary highs and lows of the Post-Fergie era; one being the feelings immediately after realizing that the Alexis Sanchez signing was a huge bust, and 10 being the feelings after watching the Paul Pogba announcement video with Stormzy.
We’re thankful we can just relax for a week with no football after this start. We hope the team is doing the appropriate soul-searching to be ready for the noisy neighbors in two weeks’ time.
Ultimately, the vibes reading after a win isn’t going to read less than after that “positive loss” to Arsenal, but, all things considered, it ain’t gonna read higher either, ya dig?
5/10
Positive Influences
- A win!
- A new goalkeeper!
- Kobbie Mainoo didn’t go out on loan!
- Don’t have to hear about The Bomb Squad anymore!
- LOL, I forgot to mention Erik ten Hag was sacked by Bayer Leverkusen after two matches!
Negative Influences
- The win still left much to be desired!
- Injuries already?!
- I’m still not sure that Amorim knows what to do with Mainoo, and I really hope he figures it out so Mainoo isn’t cast aside!
- Man, we sure have wasted a lot of money signing promising young players and then excommunicating them in favor of stubborn disciplinary managers!
