The School: McNeese State University. Founded in 1939 as Lake Charles Junior College, then renamed a year later to John McNeese Junior College. John McNeese, per Wikipedia, was the first superintendent of schools of Imperial Calcasieu Parish, which apparently gets a university named for you in southwest Louisiana. Around here you have to build an entire fucking railroad empire and have ancestors who are still rich 150 years after your death to get that honor.
Location: Lake Charles, Louisiana. About
30 miles east of the Texas state line, which makes it an ideal place to build a bunch of casinos and bribe the Texas Legislature to keep gambling illegal in that state and thus keep Houston residents having to make a two-hour drive to gamble away their life savings. Which, fine, that’s actually probably preferable to letting them do it on an app on their phone. (Fine, fine, nowadays Kalshi and Robinhood exist to separate you from your money in a way that’s somehow not considered “gambling.”) That and oil money is how Louisiana keeps its economy alive, all while frequent hurricanes threaten to literally sink the southern part of the state into the Gulf of Mexico.
Lake Charles is basically “what if Shreveport, but somehow even sadder.” Yes, there is a lake in Lake Charles. No, you do not want to place any portion of your body in it.
Mascot: Rowdy the Cowboy. What your five-year-old names a cowboy.
Yes, “made the smart choice” when you go to a school that was a junior college within your parents’ lifetime.
Record: 28-5 (19-3 Southland.) A gaudy record that included exactly two NCAA Tournament teams (Santa Clara and Michigan), both of whom they lost to. Also beat “Classical Christian” 127-65 and “Biblical Studies” 132-50. Beating Biblical Studies by 82 points is a decent metaphor for Louisiana.
How’d they get here? Automatic bid winner from the Southland Conference. Finished second to Stephen F. Austin in the regular season, then for some reason got to play the conference tournament on their home court and beat SFA to get in. But not before needing triple overtime to beat UT Rio Grande Valley in the semifinals, thanks to missing nearly half of their free throws.
Best win: Beat George Washington 92-86 on a neutral court all the way back in November. You’ll notice that the Southland Conference now plays an absurd 22-game schedule, meaning that most of their schedule was against that conference… or, you know, non-Division I teams. SFA is only slightly behind George Washington in KenPom, but the Cowboys did not beat SFA away from home.
Most embarrassing loss: Lost 71-67 at Incarnate Word back on December 1. That only slightly beats out losing to Michigan by 41 points.
Coach: Technically not Will Wade and his child-bearing hips any more, but it might as well be, with his former associate head coach Bill Armstrong in charge. Prior to joining LSU’s coaching staff, he was a longtime assistant under Andy Kennedy at Ole Miss. Managed to be found not guilty of recruiting violations in relation to Wade getting caught on a federal wiretap talking about a “strong ass offer,” which… well, hey, that’s actually kind of an accomplishment.
Best player: Larry “Not That Larry Johnson” Johnson, who was a top-75 recruit out of high school and is averaging 17.5 points per game as a redshirt freshman. How that guy ends up at McNeese State is not clear. Presumably, he will not be playing at McNeese State next season.
All-Name Team Nominee: You would think a school located in south Louisiana would have some all-namers for sure, but there isn’t a single player from Louisiana on the roster. Bummer. That leaves us to go with Garwey Dual, mostly because his last name is actually pronounced “Do-All.”
Best NCAA Tournament result: Has made the NCAA Tournament four times, and last year was the first time they won a game. So, it’s 2025 by default. They beat Clemson in the first round before getting drilled by Purdue. (Honorable mention goes to the 1989 team, which got a 16-seed but kept it within single digits against top seed Illinois.)
Should Vanderbilt be scared? I mean, yeah. Even if 26 of your 33 games are against the Southland Conference, Biblical Studies, and Champion Christian, you don’t go 28-5 by accident. Vanderbilt is favored but I would keep your blood pressure medication within reach for this one.
