On the surface, Grace Yockey's life looks like that of a typical recent college graduate.
She works a remote job, spends time with friends and family and enjoys her daily ritual of getting coffee down the
street with "the coolest roommate of all time."
But unlike most 24-year-olds, Yockey is also a caregiver. Her roommate, 83-year-old Valerie Yockey, is her grandmother. Vava, as Yockey calls her, has dementia, and her family decided nearly a year ago that she couldn't live alone any longer in her Seattle condo. Yockey, who was just getting used to post-grad life, said moving in with her grandmother was the obvious solution.
"I was living in an apartment like 10 blocks from her. And I was just like, why don't I move in with my grandma?" Yockey said, adding that Vava had an extra bedroom. "I was like, I really don't know what I'm doing in my early 20s. I'll just, I'll give it a shot. We'll do it six months, move in with grandma, see what happens."
That was in October 2025. And Yockey doesn't regret it one bit.
"The stars just aligned for me to be here and I think that's so beautiful and I'm really happy," she said. "I mean, we're carbon copies of each other, so we get along really well."
Of the 63 million caregivers in the United States, nearly 1 in 5 are between the ages of 18 and 34, according to the Caregiving in the US 2025 report from AARP and the National Alliance for Caregiving. As the senior population continues to grow − the share of Americans ages 65 and older rose from 12.4% in 2004 to 18% in 2024, according to the U.S. Census Bureau − there is increased concern among family caregivers and health care professionals alike as to who will care for this aging group. At the same time, Gen Z's growing financial anxiety has led more young adults to live at home. Some families, like Yockey's, have found that intergenerational living can be the answer.
And for Yockey and Vava, it's the most fun solution, too.
"I feel like it's added so much to my life," Yockey said.
Yockey posts videos of her adventures with Vava on Instagram, from their coffee shop walks to home piano concerts to cuddles with Yockey's cat, Tito. The videos have drawn more than 20,000 followers, and created a space for other young caregivers to connect.
"This is truly beautiful! I live with my grandma currently and I can say it’s helped me beyond words," one user wrote on a post in December.
"My grandmother with dementia just passed and seeing this makes my heart happy knowing there are others out there living the quirky life I did," another user commented.
A typical day with Grace and Vava
Vava was diagnosed with dementia in 2018, Yockey said. Her symptoms were minor at first, but during the pandemic, her family noticed larger declines. They took her car away and limited her access to her credit cards.
Yockey kept in touch with her grandma when she went off to college a little over an hour away. When she graduated in 2023 and moved back to Seattle, she met her grandmother for coffee a few times a week and they spent long lunches and evenings together. But then Yockey noticed her grandmother started to forget certain things, like where the coffee shop was. Other members of her extended family noticed concerning changes in Vava's behavior, too, and Yockey said they reached a point where Vava either had to go to an assisted living facility or live with someone full time.
That's when Yockey got the idea to move in. It was difficult at first, she said, but after about six months, her family ironed out a system that worked for Yockey, so she wouldn't get too overwhelmed with providing constant care. She said her whole family has "embraced the situation" and that "it's brought us really close together."
Every morning, after Yockey helps Vava shower and dress, Yockey's uncle comes by with groceries and to visit with Vava. Other family members call in the afternoons, when Yockey is on work calls. Her remote co-workers enjoy Vava's cameos during work meetings, Yockey said, and understand when Yockey needs to jump offline to help her grandmother. And of course Yockey and Vava have continued their daily coffee routine.
"A schedule is so important for dementia," Yockey said. "It works great that I can get work done and hang out with her."
Yockey's younger sisters come to the condo every evening to relieve Yockey of her caregiving duties − Yockey typically heads for the gym right after work. Bedtime is difficult with Vava, as is common with dementia patients, Yockey said, and sometimes they don't get to bed until 2 a.m. Yockey's mom is a nurse and "handles everything medical."
The family coordinates everything through a "Vava Task Force" group chat, Yockey said, and she's been able to get away for weekend trips and regular meetups with her friends.
"I feel like I've been able to maintain a social life," she said. "And I'm really proud of myself for advocating for that, because that's really important while caring for someone else. It's like, you have to take care of yourself."
'Things are changing.'
Besides wanting to help out and taking advantage of free rent − "the cost of living is so high," Yockey said − another reason Yockey wanted to move in with her grandmother was to address her anticipatory grief. She knows she won't be able to get this time back, she said.
"I mean, it's a hard diagnosis to receive just because grief does honestly begin upon a diagnosis," Yockey said. "You realize how much is lost and things are changing."
These days living with and caring for her grandmother are precious, Yockey said. Even when things are hard, she knows she's in the right place.
"I'm just here to give my grandma a great life," she said. "Let's give her the life of living with a 20-year-old. We like to say in our house, like, 'we're just girls.' Because we are! We're just living and it's really fun."
Madeline Mitchell's role covering women and the caregiving economy at USA TODAY is supported by a partnership with Pivotal and Journalism Funding Partners. Funders do not provide editorial input.
Reach Madeline at memitchell@usatoday.com and @maddiemitch_ on X.
This story has been updated to add video.
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: She gave up her 20s to care for her grandma with dementia. It's been the time of her life
