Kayleigh McEnany wants women to know it is possible to have kids and a high-powered career, even if it's a difficult balance.
The former White House press secretary, who is now a host on Fox News, described her experience juggling motherhood and the rarefied West Wing role in an exclusive interview in late August with USA TODAY.
McEnany, 38, had her first baby in 2019, while she was working on President Donald Trump's unsuccessful 2020 bid for reelection. She became White House press secretary in April 2020.
Since leaving the White House, she and her husband have had two more children. She says that even though her career has involved sacrifices, she doesn’t have it as hard as mothers working two jobs.
"Taking the job of your dreams and being a wonderful
mother, I realized that those two things are not mutually exclusive," McEnany said. "You can do it, and I was able to do it, but it certainly had its challenges."
The pink pacifier
McEnany reached into the back seat of the car to hand her 3-month-old a pink pacifier the moment the life-altering call came from Trump in 2020. She was hoping her daughter "would not cry during the phone call."
After McEnany answered, Trump asked her to be his next White House press secretary. She'd be taking over from Stephanie Grisham, a single mother who had opted for better hours working for first lady Melania Trump.
“I had a lot of apprehension,” McEnany said. “Not on taking the job – I was very excited from a career perspective to be taking it. But as a mom, I was thinking, ‘How can I do this?’” By then, her daughter was four months old. “I basically had to leave my baby in Florida and pray.”
Because it was the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, McEnany initially left her baby with her mom and her husband when she moved to Washington, DC. She said her mom and husband flew up to visit with the baby regularly, so her daughter ended up spending most of her time in DC.
McEnany said she made sure to have dinner with them when they were all together and flew down on the weekends when her daughter was in Florida and worked remotely.
"There are definitely moments when you’re sad," McEnany said. "I remember one time being in a motorcade thinking, 'I want to see my daughter.' But I knew that she would be very proud of me for having had this job."
'Go see your family'
McEnany credited a village of people who helped her navigate raising an infant. In addition to her mom and her husband, she said she got support from Trump and then-White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows.
She remembered one night when White House staff was watching an event. She was watching the clock tick down and became apprehensive as she realized she needed to leave for the airport for her weekend trip to Florida.
"I need to make the flight," she remembered thinking. "I want to see my daughter. I didn’t even express that to [Meadows], but he walked over to me and said, ‘Kayleigh, don’t you usually catch a flight around this time? Get out of here. Go see your family.’"
Another time, she said she flew with Trump on a day trip and returned on the presidential helicopter, Marine One, on a Saturday night. She said Trump kept asking her "over and over" where her daughter and the rest of her family were.
She said Trump looked at her and said, "Kayleigh, next time send one of the younger (aides) on the trip. You go be with your family. Nothing is more important than that time."
Now, they have pictures
McEnany said she wouldn't trade the memories for anything. She has pictures of her daughter sitting on her White House desk and of her daughter's stroller in the White House.
"I have memories of dancing with her to 'Frozen' where the Marine Band just spontaneously played 'Let it Go,'" McEnany said. And her daughter, now 6, is proud of her mom. She loves looking through those pictures.
Her advice to other working moms: "I would say prioritize family time, and when you are in that moment, learn to put down your phone. Learn to put down your device.
"Make the minutes count, and make the moments count," she said. "Because it’s about quality of time rather than the quantity of time.”
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Kayleigh McEnany, a pink pacifier and a call from Trump
