At Bark In the Park Night on Monday, most everyone on two legs seemed to agree that the new name of the Detroit Tigers’ stadium was a dog.
That’s no offense to August, a toy poodle who could fit in a batting helmet, or Beau, a Great Dane who could barely fit in a dugout, or Olive, a miniature poodle painted like a tiger, or the dozens of other canines who populated the upper deck down the right field line.
Hours before, though, to the surprise of few and delight of none, the Tigers and a couple of bankers announced that the team’s home base next season will be known as Fifth Third Park.
Boring. Obvious. Clumsy. Generic. And the sentiment was unanimous, among everybody I spoke to on a brisk and breezy night where dogs were very much welcomed at
Comerica Park:
Jeez, couldn’t you at least throw us a bone?
“Such a disappointment,” said Arilee Boyd, 44, a Detroit attorney who named August in part for her favorite playwright, August Wilson. “It should have been Tiger Stadium.”
Or Fifth Third Tiger Stadium, perhaps. Or Willie Horton Fifth Third Park, after the star outfielder from Detroit Northwestern High School whose statue stands beyond the left-field fence.
Or anything that suggested at least some connection to the team or the city. Maybe that’s out of step in an era where the New Orleans Pelicans play their NBA games at the Smoothie King Center, but why not stand out from the crowd?
"Get some Detroit in it," Boyd said, and as her 9-pound friend shivered in a Tigers T-shirt, she shook her head. "They dropped the ball on that one."
Requesting, then rejecting
The new name had been expected since February, when Fifth Third Bancorp, based in Cincinnati, engulfed and devoured Comerica, based in Dallas.
Comerica’s name has festooned the ballyard since it opened in 2000, which was seven years before the bank’s headquarters vamoosed to Texas.
One of the bankers at the press conference Monday, Sept. 21, said that Fifth Third wanted to be “a responsible partner for this team and the city's future, to honor it, invest in it, and help carry it forward for the fans and families who love it so.”
The same guy said the newly engorged financial institution solicited feedback from fans, most of which involved incorporating ”Tiger Stadium” in the new name, and it’s nice that the company gave them the opportunity to be ignored.
At least until the current naming rights deal expires in 2035, that leaves us with “Fifth Third” − and as Rocky Colo couldn’t help but notice at Bark In the Park, “That’s just a number.”
Colo, of Macomb Township, and his wife Tracy, 55, spent the evening trying to see past Beau, the placid Great Dane who kept using Rocky as a footrest.
At 18 months, Beau weighs 145 pounds. At 57 years old, Colo knows enough history to think maybe the bank should start with Briggs Stadium in the name and work its way up.
“Get some history in it,” Tracy agreed, so I suggested Ernie Harwell Fifth Third Park.
“Yes!” Rocky exclaimed.
Beau didn’t flinch. He just propped his enormous front paws back on Rocky’s thigh and turned his mammoth head toward the field.
A major league error
Monday was the season’s fifth Bark In the Park game, and give the Tigers credit for recognizing the sizeable fun factor for both the dogs and their people.
Then give the organization demerits for not stocking the gift shop with Tigers-logo dog bandanas, and maybe that explains some of the curious contracts they’ve awarded over the years to ineffective pitchers.
The Toronto Blue Jays don't offer dog nights, so Trisha Rinneard, 44, and Calvin Gaudaui, 51, had driven all the way from their home town to ours with Sadie, a 15-year-old combination of pug and Jack Russell terrier.
Somewhere in her travels, Sadie had obtained a bandana. Rinneard had picked up at least a mild appreciation for the name "Comerica Park."
Fifth Third, she said, "doesn't flow as swiftly and smoothly off the tongue," which might be the most ringing endorsement the current name ever received.
The second-most came from Paul Newman, 63, of St. Clair. "Comerica was bad enough," he said. "FIfth Third is worse."
Newman, his wife Cheryl and their two dogs, Cammer and Kaiser, were seated one row behind Lynn Hartman, which put them on the fringes of the center of attention.
Hartman, a 30-year-old dog groomer from New Haven, had brought Olive, the 4-year-old poodle dyed with tiger stripes.
"Last month, she was a giraffe," Hartman said. "She loves it."
What no one within a foul ball's reach cared for was the name change. The Tigers were leading Washington 9-0 on their way to a 9-2 victory, and Fifth Third was getting clubbed harder than the Nationals.
The bank already has its name on the Mud Hens' stadium in Toledo, but this is the big leagues. Embarrassing, someone said. Disrespectful. A swing and a miss.
Comerica paid for the naming rights and Fifth Third paid for Comerica, so it can call the place whatever it likes. But it seemed clear at Bark In the Park that the newcomers are going to get hounded.
To reach Neal Rubin with comments or ideas, or to sponsor his pens and notepads, email NARubin@freepress.com.
This article originally appeared on Detroit Free Press: Unlike the dogs at Tigers game Monday, Comerica Park's new name bites
