Every few months, the internet throws up a new dating buzzword and just when you think you've decoded them all, another one pops up. In 2026, conversations around love and loyalty are once again shifting,
with a term that’s grabbing attention (and raising eyebrows) across social media: tolyamory. But is it really something new, or just an old behaviour with a glossy rebrand?
What is Tolyamory?
Tolyamory is a term introduced by sex and relationship columnist and podcaster Dan Savage. It blends the words " tolerate and polyamory to describe a situation where one partner is aware of the others involvement outside the relationship but chooses to overlook it. there’s no confusion, no secrecy and the awareness exists, yet the relationship continues despite the breach of exclusivity. < p fetchpriority="low" loading="lazy">
While the term may sound modern, the dynamic itself isn’t new. It has existed quietly in relationships for years; it’s just now being labelled and discussed openly.
