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An unhinged “Elon Musk” hit the “Saturday Night Live” Weekend Update desk this week to address the outcome of this week’s midterm elections — and Musk, as played by “SNL” featured player Jeremy Culhane, didn’t quite
know how to address it.
The real Musk, of course, spent nearly $500 million on Republican candidates, especially in his home state of Texas — which then saw most of its statewide races turn Democratic. “Weekend Update” anchor Colin Jost attempted to get “Elon Musk” (Culhane) to address it: “Elon, you’ve been you’ve been in the news because you wasted half a billion dollars on the midterms.”
Said “Elon,” attempting to change the subject: “No, I’m in the news because my car did a flip. My car did a flip. Remember? It was like a freaking Hot Wheel. It was like, and then pop, but I was like totally chill. I was like thug life. Imagine.”
Jost then asked “Elon” about halting production on Tesla’s Cybertruck, another major piece of news coming out of Texas this week. “Do you have anything to say about that?,” Jost asked. Responded Elon: “Hey, remember when my car did a flip? It was epic. It was like, but everyone was like, ‘Whoa!’ But I was just like, ‘Hold my beer.'”
“Elon” continued to ramble: “Then like, you, me, and Che, we’re just like there. We’re just like hanging out, doing like epic vulgar roast of each other. And then these girls are like, ‘Can we hang?’ And we’re like, ‘No, you know, we’re good.’ And then like, imagine my leather jacket becomes like a suit of armor, like, ‘shing, shing,’ and everybody’s like, ‘Elon, Elon, Elon.’ That would be amazing, man. Amazing. Like, imagine?”
Responded Jost: “I cannot believe you are the richest person in the world.”
Jost them recapped for Musk: “You moved to Texas because California was run by Democrats. You moved all your companies to Texas. Because you didn’t want to pay taxes. You even built your own town in Texas. And now Texas is run by Democrats. So now you’re going to have to pay taxes. So how does that make you feel?”
Said “Elon”: “Bad.”
“I guess that’s what I thought. I mean, I would feel bad too,” Jost said.
Responded “Elon”: “Ouchie! Ouchie! That is another epic vulgar roast from Colin Jost, my poorest friend.”
So what is an “epic vulgar roast”? “It’s my AI Grok’s most epic hardcore feature,” “Elon” said. “It’s so vulgar and hilariously funny.” Then Elon asked Grok to make a few “epic vulgar roasts” at his own expense, and the roasts, admittedly, were pretty epic:
“Elon Musk, you’re the worst thing South Africa has ever done.”
“When you’re on TV, it feels like an episode of ‘Hate on the Spectrum.'”
“If you have 100 more kids, one of them will talk to you.”
Ouchie Wouchie!
