Calvin Barrett is a writer, editor, and prolific Mario Kart racer located in Tokyo, Japan. Currently writing for SB Nation and FanSided, he has covered the Utah Jazz and BYU athletics since 2024 and graduated from Utah Valley University.
I WAS PERUSING my social media feed like the socially inept 20-something that I am. Brainless. Thoughtless. Careless. Images and comments light up the glossy film at my fingertips, designed for pure brain stimulation. Sometimes I’m fully cogniscent that such activities
are destined to sear my dopamine receptors; abusing the very hormones designed to keep my life fulfilling. I’m on a roll, though, and refuse to let science and reasonable life choices stand in the way of steamrolling through a forgettable hour or two of my day.
Often, the decision to dissolve into an amorphous blob on the couch as my retinas take in an essence-consuming array of photos and short-form swipable videos surpasses self-awareness. It’s not until I’m reminded of the clock that realization consumes me like a Vertigo dolly zoom. My vision blurs. Heartbeat intensifies. The second hand lands like a sledgehammer with every tick.
THUD. THUD. THUD. THUD.
Wait a minute. Am I going to let this tiny icon on a phone screen erase me from an entire world for the day? Mountains stand firm and immovable, beckoning the next 1,000 adventurers to scale their mighty peaks. Birds conduct a symphonic melody, resonating from treetop to treetop. The delicate babble of a stream is a rushing superhighway below the surface, with an assortment of fish species rushing past one another in a heated grand prix.
And I allow my habitat to start and end at the pleather-saddled edge of my sofa. I am the engineer of my own decay.
Forget this. I’m going to do something. I’m going to be something. Leave this forsaken land for one better. An entire world awaits my arrival, and I’m going to make an impression.
Raising the phone in one hand, a triumphant fist constituting the other, I make a solemn vow that from this day for—
Whoa. That’s what the new court looks like?
— Utah Jazz (@utahjazz) August 1, 2025
The nerdy girl took off her glasses and became hot.
It’s a trope almost as old as Superman himself (apologies for those who remained in the Clark Kent bubble, but your second favorite writer of all time is actually an alien from the planet Krypton. Grow up). The ugly duckling swims through its entire childhood to emerge as a beautiful and elegant swan. The very hungry caterpillar begins as the poster child for gluttony before entering its chrysalis to emerge as a spectacular butterfly.
Well, the Utah Jazz have been gestating since the onset of basketball’s most heinous and straight-up wrong rebrand that traded a cascading palette of desert color for a Sharpie highlighter from the Dollar Tree.
But all wrongs can be made right, and what Utah has done in the second iteration of their rebrand is so, so right. The decedent, rich purple, soaking up the spotlight with a gentle, comforting baby blue as its accent. The cascading mountains cresting at the center of it all. The remastered font from the late 90s now spells out “Utah” in a bold, classic, and stunning arrangement sure to set the fashion world ablaze.
It’s just a shame Jordan Clarkson won’t be here to enjoy it.
We were already treated to the opening course of this meal with the “Mountain Basketball” campaign over a year ago in June 2024, where the world was introduced to the pure majesty of the incoming white jersey (to make its debut this season).
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Utah JazzOh yeah. That’s the stuff.
The Utah Jazz are beautiful again. Like a flower in full bloom, this recapturing of the Jazz identity is indicative of the transformation beneath the surface. The petals appear and spread out wide, welcoming the admiration and awe of its onlookers. Stunning in every sense of the word.
Unfortunately, pure aesthetic appeal does not provide a boost to the win column, nor Utah’s championship odds. Though the bloom is stunning for now, I feel it is best to remind us of what happens to flowers around the time basketball season begins. That’s the product you’ll see on the floor. But surely we can appreciate the absence of the bright yellow stain in Jazz history.
With a fresh coat of paint, so arrives a fresh outlook for Utah’s prospects moving into the future. Though the team itself is still years removed from proper competition, today, they lay the groundwork for a prosperous tomorrow.
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